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Flight Recordings

The House Call (commercial break)

Jeffrey Channing Wells

Learning to Fly

The House Call (commercial break)

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Learning to Fly
Announcer: Next, on an all new episode of Cobs.

[Ponyville. Applejack stands proudly by a big tarp-covered wagon.]

Applejack: I tell all y'alls, this here is fixin' to be some of the best sweet corn you ever tasted.

[Applejack pulls the tarp off. Everypony reacts in horror to the ghastly sight of an entire wagon full of corn cobs.]

Rarity: This corn... looks like it's been.... EATEN!

[She screams. Cut to a navy blue pony dressed in colorful boots with the yellow letters "PBI" on his flank and a small brown pony wearing an elaborate necklace and sporting a corn-cob cutie mark.]

Boots: I'm special agent Silly Boots of the Pony Bureau of Investigation. This is my colleague, Cobs, from the Forensic Kollyvology department at the Celestonian Institute.

Pinkie Pie: Why do they call you Silly Boots?

Cobs (pedagogically): Well, as you can see, his boots are very silly.

[Close on Boots's boots, which are stripey and emblazoned with the word "Cocky".]

Pinkie Pie (putting her nose right up to them to investigate): You're right! Those are silly boots! Wow, Twilight, Doctor Cobs is even smarter than you, I bet!

Cobs: That's true. I am an exeptionally intelligent pony.

[Twilight fumes.]

Cobs: However, I wish you wouldn't call me "Cobs".

[And then, to noone in particular:]


[The lab in Canterlot. Dr. Cobs, her mane tied back now, addresses Hodgins, a manticore, and Wendell, a gryphon.]

Hodgins: Black fly larvae on the corn cobs indicate that the corn was shucked and stripped at least two days ago.

Wendell (holding a corn cob under a magnifier): Look at this. See this distinctive six-sided pattern to the cobs?

Cobs (peering intently at the magnifier): You're right.

[Angela, a white Pegasus Pony, wanders in.]

Angela: What's that mean?

Cobs (looking up from the magnifier: It means the corn was cut off the cob before it was eaten.

Angela: But corn on the cob is delicious! Who would have done such a horrible thing?

[Cut to the library in Ponyville. Spike is standing near a cooking pot.]

Spike: Hey, Twilight! I made your favorite! Creamed Corn!

[Thunderous, ominous music sting.]

Announcer: Tonight, after Housecall.

(ed.: not really.)

  • At first I thought you were making some kind of sense, what with a cob referring to a horse and all. Then I read the entry.



    Though I gotta say,"Cobs" with a corncob cutie mark is adorable.

    Silly... Boots...

    It remains to be seen whether I'm going to be calling Booth "Boots" for the next several months. I bet we could get other people in on it.
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